A Faith Journal

I’ve been trying to come up with something to write for today, but I was getting nothing. I decided to just post one from 2023. When I opened up the post, I knew God was using my past self to teach/preach to my current self. I see the ignorance in my past self about grief, but truly it is good advice that I’ve not been taking. Thanks God for the reminder. Your peace is not as we typically see it as but can be found in our communities as we grieve.

Yesterday we looked at what biblical peace is, wholeness. Many of us don’t feel whole, during this time of year especially. Family is not close, or we’ve lost a family member recently and this season highlights those losses. There are several other reasons why we might not feel whole, but they all result in a chaotic season. God wants us to feel whole, but we can’t do it alone. We need community to achieve this, which may seem odd, since opening ourselves to others may bring tension to our comfort level. In other words, peace feels less likely when others are involved. However, with the right people, peace is possible. James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” To pray for each other, we must first be in community with others.

Here are a few examples of where community can be found:
1.   This should probably be obvious, but ask God to lead you to the correct people to help you,
2.   Family and friends (they already know you and want to know how you are feeling),
3.   A counselor or group that has experience with your situation (a church group, therapy group, AA, etc.).

I’ve found that when we let others know how we feel, typically they are experiencing or have experienced something similar. Also, instead of trying to ignore the missing loved ones during this time, you can feel more at peace when you talk about some fond memeories you had with them, do something they would enjoy or find some way to include their memory in the season. It will be emotional but can also be healing.

Lord,
We seek Your peace this Christmas season. We have hurts that get highlighted during the holidays and we really want to have healing in those areas. Bring the correct people into our lives that can pray with us and help us heal during this Christmas season. It’s in Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.

When most of us think of peace, it is a lack of conflict or disturbances. However, peace in the Bible has a deeper meaning. The Hebrew term Sar Shalom means Prince of Peace in English. Prince of Peace is one of God’s many names. So, when we look at Shalom or biblical peace, we see that it does mean lack of conflict, but it also means whole or complete. When we seek peace, we are seeking wholeness. To put it in more visual terms, think about your life as a wall. At some point in your life, cracks start to appear in your wall. We have cracks of fear for our children or parents. Cracks of worry for our health or finances. Cracks of anxiety for our worth or abilities. Cracks of untrust in our relationships, including the one we have with God. Over time those cracks multiply and grow larger to the point where we don’t know how the wall can stay up on its own, and we are not strong enough to hold it up on our own. We then fall to our knees and pray for God’s strength and peace. When He provides the peace we seek, the Holy Spirit fills in those cracks to make us whole again. For some reason, we almost always forget that the cracks are being held together by the Holy Spirit and fight Him to take back control of our lives. It never fails though that we must pray for God’s strength again, eventually. I’m not sure why we continue this dance with God off and on throughout our lives, but we do. We get stronger in some of those broken areas, but we are never complete without God in our lives.

Just think, if God had not sent Jesus to live among us, we would’ve never had the Holy Spirit available to us and we would not be the complete individuals that God created us to be. The chaos that we normally feel during this time of year could just be one of our moments of trying to be in control of our walls. Yet I’m already noticing this year, as I am focusing more on hearing from God, those cracks in my wall don’t seem to be as big or concerning to me. God and I are dancing harmoniously this season, instead of in a dance battle where I undoubtedly lose every time.

(Update…while I’m not fully trying to control my wall, I am finding that I am fixating on certain cracks and wondering if I can trust the structure. I know, not trusting God with those cracks is silly, but who among us hasn’t done it themselves before? He never said He would hold our walls completely intact, but that when that part of the wall needs to be removed to move us forward, he will be there with us in the mess. Because sometimes to find peace we have to first work through the chaos. While God and I are not completely harmonious this Christmas, we are not in a dance battle. He’s leading and I’m stepping on his toes from time to time. 😉)

This week, find Shalom in God. Seek Him and He will begin to fill in those cracks to make you whole again. (Or sit with you in the construction zone as the needed repairs happen.)

Sar Shalom,
We seek you today for the wholeness that only you can provide. Our hearts and minds are full of cracks that need your peace to fill. We give our lives and walls to you so that you can complete in us the work that you have planned for us. We are worthy of your peace, and we seek it today, this season, and the rest of our lives. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen. 

P.S. For a video on Shalom/Peace, check out this Bible Project video.

Here is another repost from 2023. It was the last post for the week of Hope. Some of this may not line up with what has been posted so far, but the main message is still true. There is still one more post for our week in hope. Enjoy.

I heard something interesting recently on some social media site. Sorry they all blend together for me, so I’m not even sure where it was or who the woman was that shared it. However, it was placed in my rotation by God, I’m sure. The woman was comparing our expectations with God’s reality. We live in a world where instant gratification is sought out and expected for nearly everything. Her example for this is a microwave. We want our lives to be lived at max power so that we can get all we want as fast as possible. God’s reality is something a little slower. It takes time and work to achieve what God has planned for us. She used a crock pot for this example. She then went on to say if we try to take the crock pot meal and turn it into a microwave meal, it just doesn’t taste as good. If we want the good life God has planned for us, we must let Him be in control and be glad for the slow and steady process He has.

As I was thinking about this analogy and the wrap up of Hope week of Advent, God was reminding me that hoping in Him will always be worth it. Just like a good crock pot meal, there are moments that everything is just individual ingredients that may seem odd together, but with just the right amounts, the proper temperature or tension, time and the knowledgeable cook (God), our lives can be amazing.

As I was praying about this post, I heard to look at Isaiah. Well, that makes sense because the first week of Advent is also known by some as the prophecy week and Isaiah is full of prophecy and hope. The part He led me to was Isaiah 42 though, not the prophecy of the virgin birth ( Isaiah 7:14). Chapter 42 speaks of a chosen servant. Obviously, this is Jesus, but it is also believed to be all of God’s chosen people, His children. As His children we need to learn to praise God as we wait in the tension for all that He has planned for us. Again, to go back to the crock pot analogy, as time goes on, the ingredients mixed together in a crock pot begin to smell good. When we praise God, it gives a pleasing aroma to Him. Also, in chapter42 it speaks of how God’s people don’t always heed what is shown to them and choose to do life their own way. This would be the equivalent to microwaving a crock pot meal. It “can” be done, but is it really going to be that good?

This week we’ve looked at hope in various ways. I pray that one of them has helped you draw closer to God as we begin this Christmas season. I pray you find time to praise God in some way daily. I’ll share a link to one of my favorite Christmas songs sung in a way that reflects my youth and current musical interests mixed together.

God,

We praise you and all you blessed us with when you sent your son to us. Hope would not exist without His birth, death and resurrection. Thank you for the reminder that life is meant to be lived with You in control and at times slow and steady. Instant gratification is nice from time to time, but we need to realize a life full of instant gratification is only an imitation of the good life you have waiting for us. We take this time to place our hope in all you have planned. Use us to spread hope to others and be an example of what a life lived with you looks like. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Do you feel bold this season? I’d be willing to guess that many of us feel anything but bold. For many of us, we are busy going from one activity to another. Or we are trying to hide from the extreme emotions the holidays can bring with them. Either way, few of us are feeling bold, confident or courageous. Yet many of us would say that we are hopeful that at some point this Christmas season, a moment will happen and you will see the hand of God.

Why is it that at Christmas even in sadness we can find a moment so profound that it can only be by God’s hand that it occurred? It happens all the time, but we seem to notice more at Christmas. Paul likely has the answer in 2 Corinthians 3. When Jesus came to dwell among us, He altered the way we see and understand the Old Testament. No one expected a baby to be born in such a humble way and be the King of kings. Not only did he alter how we looked to the past, he altered how we view the future.

In the past, many could not look at God or not be fearful of the angels that God sent as his messengers. There was a barrier, whether due to God’s glory or not, that hindered the faith and hope of his people. Is it as Paul explains, a veil over their hearts that has kept many from seeing the true glory of God?

As Jesus grew and eventually died for us, he gave everyone a new perspective of what the glory of God looks like. Those that were bold enough to embrace and seek God’s glory lived full lives. Lives full of joy, hardship, trials and treasures. So similarly to those who lived before us.

 How then are we different? We have hope. Hope that God will heal our bodies, our minds and our souls. Hope that peace is possible. Hope that we will one day be reunited with God in heaven. Because of this hope, we can live bold lives that express that faith, hope and love for God.

So while you may not feel bold this Christmas season, know that even a small hope is bold enough to move you forward toward God and all He has for you.

Another repost but really it’s a good reminder that what we hope the future will look like, we may never get to see it personally. It’s still important to work towards that future though.

Today we’ll start to look at the Christmas story as told by Matthew. Matthew and Luke both tell the Christmas story, but Matthew’s version focuses more from Joseph’s perspective while Luke’s is more from Mary’s perspective. Before we get to the birth of Jesus in Matthew, we see a full genealogy report. Why does Matthew put this in there? The book of Matthew is full of references to the Old Testament and this list of names is just the start of them. We see in verse 1 that Matthew points to two of Israel’s most respected and important “fathers.” With each of these fathers, we see they trusted God and never got to see the fulfillment of all God promised them. Abraham was promised to be a father with as many descendants as there are stars in the sky. Also, his descendants would have all the land from the Egypt border to the Euphrates River (Genesis 15). He got to see his son grow up, but nothing else of the promise. David was promised to have one of his descendants build a temple for God (2 Samuel 7). David prepared for the physical temple, but never saw it built. Joseph was Jesus’ earthly father. He was told Jesus would save his people from sin, but Joseph didn’t live long enough to see Jesus fulfill His role as savior (Matthew 1).

What does all this have to do with hope, you may ask? Each of these men listened and obeyed God, hoping that future generations would benefit from the work they did for God. We have benefited, but are future generations going to benefit from what we are doing now? What we do for God is just as important now, as it was then. Jesus will be returning, and it is our calling to reach others to prepare them and future generations. God has blessed you in some way, use it to bless someone else. The use of your gift from God could bless future generations. You’ll probably never see its full effect but know God will not let your efforts go to waste. With everything we do for God, we are hopeful that future generations realize we were working for them to have a blessed future with God.

Lord,

We see the sacrifices, trials and troubles that past generations have experienced to progress Your kingdom. They didn’t always do as you said, but you used what they did to help future generations. We want to help future generations be prepared, as well, for Jesus’ return. Show us how we can use the gifts you have given us to do so. We pray that all our trials and troubles can also be used to strengthen future generations. We place our trust and hope in you. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.

When I wrote this nearly 2 years ago, I had not experienced the pain of grieving Chris. As I was writing this series, I didn’t realize that Christmas season would be his last. This post hits a little differently now, but I still stand by it. Never does it say the pain will end on this side of heaven. If you are struggling with grief this season, know you are not alone and that while the pain may not end on this side of heaven, God still has a plan for you. If you need someone to lean on, reach out, I’ve got you.

Today we are going to stay with this idea of hope when everything seems quiet from God or when we are questioning His ways. During these times, hope may seem impossible. What good comes from bad things happening? Why can’t God give us answers in a clear way we can understand? I don’t have the answers for those types of questions, but I know of at least one time God went “silent.” It is a blank page in most Bibles, between Malachi and Matthew, that represents somewhere around 400 years of “silence.” I put quotations around silence because, can the creator of the universe really be silent? His creations speak volumes if we listen. Also, I’d be willing to bet He spoke to individuals, just not prophets, like the Israelites were used to.

A lot can happen and change in 400 years. To put that into perspective, the United States has only been a country for 247 years and A LOT has changed. We’ve experienced many growing pains in our past as we have tried to figure out this “experiment” we call the United States. We will likely continue to experience them as cultures and environments change and progress. We will likely never have a clear answer for why these events happen, but we can choose to trust that God is good, and He will lead us on the best path if we listen and obey Him.

Today, if pain and heartache try to steal your hope, remember the acronym H.O.P.E. (hold on pain ends). I would even say if that seemed too difficult right now, try “hold on pain eases,” over time. Grieving and questioning God’s ways are nothing new. During their 400 years of silence, the Israelites had to fight to keep their hope alive as well. The simplest and yet most difficult thing to do is to pray and give it all to God. However, just think what reward the Israelites got after 400 years of persevering; to walk this Earth with Jesus and learn from Him. Let’s keep our hope alive so that we can one day do the same.

Lord,
Many of us have questions. We would love answers to all our questions, but I know we can’t all handle the whole truth. Please give us answers or guide us on our right path. As we fight the pain and heartache that tries to steal our hope, give us peace that only you can wash over us. We seek you and your ways today and always, even when we don’t understand them. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.

P.S. Here is a link to my favorite band’s (for King & Country) song titled Hold On Pain Ends if you are interested.

I’m bringing this out from my old blog site.  It was initially shared on April 4th, 2022. God has been bringing this to mind a lot lately so I am bringing it out as a start to the Advent season. Be the light this season. There are a lot of people sitting in the dark seeking something and need your spark of light. Share your light for all. Enjoy this old post and know the path you travel with God is amazing, no matter how simple it may seem at times.

Down in the valley I sit waiting for the sun to hit me and show me the way out. Yet when the sun hits, it is just enough to show me what is just beside me. So, I sit waiting for more light. The light does not grow any brighter though. Eventually I choose to get up and move to the edge of the light. The first move expanded the light just a little, so I moved further. Then the light grew, and I could see down the path a few feet. It seemed like a rocky path but one that could easily be taken. As I traveled the path with only minor difficulty, I grew more comfortable with the amount of light I had but was not looking around to see what I was passing. I was concentrating on the path even though I now could walk it without being so focused on it.

Then the light began to fade and flicker. When I looked around to see what was happening, I realized there was someone else close by. Why did they want my light? Why couldn’t they wait for their own light? As I looked around and contemplated this, I saw another light far off, but why was it so far away? I could never make it that far in the dark especially if I were now sharing my light. I took a step away from the person and my light grew dimmer. I stopped again and thought about how just a little bit ago I had sat alone in the dark. So, I turned around and held out my hand to the other person. When they took their step, our light source seemed to grow stronger. We were not always in sync and our light source seemed to trade off on whose it was. Sometimes it was brighter around me and other times it was brighter around them, but we continued together. I would look out from time to time to see if that far off other light was still there. It was. Sometimes it seemed close but then others it seemed far off again.

After traveling with the other person for a bit, I looked down and noticed the ground was getting a little more difficult to travel and the light source was splitting. The other person was moving to the far opposite side of the path, and they were taking most of the light source with them. I needed the light; my side of the path was getting more difficult. When I tried to go toward them, my light dimmed even more but when I veered toward the more difficult side, the light would get just a little brighter. Why can’t I go that way with them? I gave them the light they started with. Why am I being left in the dark again?

After some time of looking around at the path before me that was nearly blocked with boulders and scary shadows, I decided to take a step toward it. My light grew a little brighter as if to say, I have been waiting for you to make that step. With each step I take, I get just enough light in front of me to take the next step. Every once in a while, I bump into some boulders, but they only slow me down a little. I have to climb over a few but they do not stop me. After a while like this, I look up to see the far-off light I had been seeing was awfully close now. The space between me and the other light is very dark and scary though and I do not want to move too fast since there are still boulders on my path. I continue to move and while my light is not bright, it is still with me. Suddenly, the far-off light was there and someone else was holding out their hand to me like I had done before to the other person. When I joined their light, my light grew brighter, and we were able to go on our path much quicker. There were not as many boulders and the ones that were there were able to be easily avoided.

I was really enjoying the walk with this other person. Our path had continued to get easier as we traveled, but then I felt a tug in my gut to pull my light from the other. I did not want to, though, because we were making such progress together. So, I continued with the other light and I felt my light weaken with each step. I tried to draw from the other light, but it just was not helping me. Finally, I had to stop. The other person continued, and their light grew brighter.

I grew angry. Why did their light grow brighter and mine nearly go out? I sat there in the darkness again thinking about why my light was not as good or as bright as the others. I wanted what they had, but no matter how much I looked to their light, mine did not get brighter. Okay fine! I chose then to look at my light. It was weak in some areas, bright in other spots. Yet I knew that my tiny light had so much potential. I wanted my light to shine so bright! What would make my light shine again so that I could see my way out of the dark valley for good?

I sat and thought, for a while, back to when I had started. What had I done to start the light? Nothing, it had just appeared. Yet the more I thought about it, the more I realized I had never really been in total darkness. There had never been a moment I was without light. There were moments I had been in shadows or near darkness but never full darkness.

Once I understood this, I realized that my light was directing me back the way I had just come. I stood up and moved back down the path. With each step, much like when I first began, my light grew stronger. When I reached a spot where I felt I should veer, I noticed it was the spot I had ignored when I passed by it last time. This time I veered but my light grew dim again and the path seemed harder to navigate. Maybe I made a wrong turn, maybe I should have kept going. Then just as I was about to give up, I noticed a flicker just ahead. Was someone else on this path?

Despite fearing the darkness just outside of my circle of light, I ran ahead of the light. Or at least I tried to. It stayed with me every step of the way. As I drew closer, I barely saw that there was someone on the path, but their light was almost gone. I would have missed them if their light had not flickered when I first drew close. Why was their light almost gone? When the person saw me, their light began to flicker more frequently. They tried to stand but their legs could not seem to hold them. They sat back down, and I noticed that their light was now constant but still weak. I decided to sit down beside them so we could talk and see if I could help them. After sitting there for a bit, enjoying each other’s company, I saw that both of our lights were growing stronger. The other person told me they were now feeling strong enough to stand. So, we stood up and began a slow walk down our path. The path that earlier seemed difficult was now much easier.

After a short distance, we found someone else with a flickering light. The person I was walking with decided to sit with the person. Before they sat down, though, they hugged me and sent me on my way. I was once again alone with my light that was now just barely wider than me but the brightest it had ever been. I was feeling confident that the darkness was not something to fear. As I continued down my path, others joined me from time to time and my light continued to fluctuate as my hope and confidence levels changed.

Then one day a light so bright that it took away all the darkness appeared. The person with this light radiated love and warmth. I could not help but draw close to them. As I stood there, they turned me around to show me where I had just come from. When I turned around, I saw that others were in the valley I had just emerged from. The person next to me asked if I would like to see the path I had taken through the dark valley. I of course wanted to see it since I had only seen bits and pieces of it as I traveled along.

When I looked back at the valley, I could see the darkness, but I could also see what was just outside of the path and my light source. There were times that had I not run into a boulder, I could have fallen down a ravine. Or had I had enough light to see the full path, I would not have gone since there were predators just outside of my light. Other times I saw that had I been paying attention to my surroundings, I would have seen others I could have walked with, at least for a little bit. I wish I would have noticed them when I had initially walked the path.

I then spotted how every where I had been walking, there was a residual light lingering for a little bit after me. The person beside me said to pay attention to my path after I went through. That is when I saw others come out of the darkness and my residual light helped spark their light. Those people took their light down their own path and had similar reactions to their lights. I asked this person next to me how it was possible that even when I felt my light was its weakest, people were still being drawn to it? They said to remember back to when I saw other lights on my path and how I felt. Did I want to run from it or toward it? Every time I ran to it.

That is how they were too. Every little spark combines to make a fire. If a spark cools off when it is away from the others, all it needs to do is draw near to other sparks to be ignited again. So many sparks were coming from my path after the person next to me said that that I thought a small fire was igniting my path and then the valley. I had no idea that my simple light had such an impact over the time I had been traveling through the valley. The person next to me said that as long as we have hope, our sparks can set the world on fire.

Why did I write this simple little story? As I was sitting one day thinking about how broken and flawed I am, I looked down at my arm tattoo and heard God remind me that He uses those types of people. I have a broken, flawed word on my arm that I use as a constant reminder that God uses our brokenness to help others. There are times that we get to see God use our brokenness to help others. There are times when we have no clue others see our flaws and use them to grow themselves. Just remember that as long as we have faith, hope and love (1 Corinthians 13:13), we can continue down our paths no matter how difficult they are at times. Trust the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). Broken and flawed people are everywhere you look. No one is 100% put together no matter how much it may seem they are. Know that your brokenness is not too broken or messy for God to use. Let Him use it to bring comfort and peace to others as you walk down life’s path with Him.

The thing we need to remember as we travel down our paths, is that we are each beautifully unique and are not going to have the same experiences as those around us. We will travel together from time to time, but we will not have the same experiences, see the same beauties, or have the same fears. As God as our light source down our paths, it will be full of love though. Be sure to share your light and try not to hide it under a bushel because even though it may seem weak or not as beautiful as someone else’s it is the perfect spark that someone needs, and you may never know when they need it.